No doubt there are worse consequences having an unemployed husband, but one of the side effects that comes to mind this holiday season is never getting a chance to pull my little black dress out of its plastic tomb. Although I attended a party in early December, it was held in the backyard of a neighbor, and it was so cold that wearing a black, sleeveless dress was out of the question. Unless, of course, I wanted to hide my holiday frock behind a huge black parka with fur around the hood. Heck, I was freezing in a sweater, pants, Santa socks, and boots, so who knows how long I’d last in a dress.
Being in Southern California has turned me into a total wuss.
My husband and I went home early blue and shivering. We might have stayed at the party longer if there weren’t icicles hanging from various body parts. Upon returning home, I put on the warmest pajamas I own which I won’t describe here because they’re only available to those married for 20 years or more.
A little black dress needs an event, not just a backyard party.
My husband worked for Intuit for 10 years (until he was laid off a little over two years ago), a company whose human resource personnel really know how to put on a Christmas party. The parties weren’t all perfect but they were all definitely memorable. One of the first I remember was held at the San Diego Museum of Art. Imagine sharing festive adult beverages, cocktail wienies, and chatter while walking among paintings that are over 200 years old.
Crazy, right?
I couldn’t focus on catching up with all the Intuit folks because of all the fabulous paintings. People spoke to me as I walked past heading in another direction to the next 200 year old piece. Having any form of ADD is definitely not a benefit when attending a function with so much to look at. In fact, the best place for me and my ADD “date” was at the San Diego Convention Center for another Intuit Christmas party. It was cold, dark, echo-y, and not very festive although it was excellent for keeping me in my seat. As my kids now say annoyingly all the time now (usually about my attempts at cooking), “an epic fail.”
Intuit learned a lot from that downtown experience, and did not repeat the failure again.
My husband works for himself now and mainly from home, so the opportunity to wear my little black dress to an elegant soiree is limited. He spends the day in sweatpants and a t-shirt so I think wearing my little black dress while vacuuming would be overkill.
If I don’t plan the company Christmas party myself, none will ever happen. It just isn’t that important to him. And since I didn’t realize until it was too late that attending a company Christmas party meant something to me (yes, I know…I was shocked, too), none happened. My dress will spend another year in plastic wrap, just like a forgotten Christmas fruitcake.
Definitely next year, though. Definitely.
Bloggoneit's Blog 
Love your humor, and you’re right, a little black dress needs an occasion! Though vacuuming in it would be quite the visual 😛
1. I think you should vacuum in the dress.
2. Let’s plan a function where we need to look fancy pants.
No doubt about it but we may want to wait until I can fit into my black dress. I just realized I may have overindulged a bit this holiday season. Or, I guess I could also use aforementioned event to buy a new one!!
I enjoyed this post a lot. Like your transparency and thoughtfulness. Keep up the good work! 🙂